Ironic message

Way to often I wake up to read, then pray, then read something else, then another thing and then think about what I should do, should I pray again, maybe I'll journal, then I'll feel like I should pray again.

Who was leading those thoughts? Me or Christ?

Stop expecting other people's writings, even your own journalling to do the trick.

The only peace and Joy that will be true and found today is when you go to Jesus and stay there with Him.

Finding your day spiraling downward way to often and seeing yourself trying way to hard to stay positive?

Are you living a so-called christian life? Or do you have a real relationship with Him?

I know somedays I do and others I don't, I just thought I did.

Reexamined lately?

Late last night I got angry.  I snapped at Jodi, I closed up and went into my bomb-shelter mind/sphere.  I stopped all rational thoughts towards allowing myself to evaluate where my change in mood was coming from.  I stopped listening to positive thoughts and lost control of what a negative thought was.  I was listening to what I knew as my enemy, but wasn't choosing to dismantle a bomb I knew full well how to stop.    


The truth is I began to feel something come over me and felt like a failure.  I was believing that I was failing at being a friend to friends, failing at being a husband and just flat out failing at living the way I should.


Jodi and I were about to read "Forgotten God" by Francis Chan and then fall asleep, but instead I began to get attacked and then lash out of fear that the words I was hearing were true.  But they weren't.  I  hear the words often.  Maybe you do to?  


"You're a failure at everything you put your mind to"
"You thinking you do ministry for the Lord, but you hurt more than help."
 "You have no calling or purpose, and who really does or has ever found it?"
"The people you consider friends don't call you their friend."
"You are not living as if Christ lives in you."
"You call Him Lord and Master, but do not live like that is true."
"You're attempts at doing anything good is only for personal gain, and you think you're a Christian?."
"Why are you even here?"
"You need to get away, become a recluse, and then things will settle and get better."
   (these are only a few)


And in those lies, I heard over all of them the loudest one, "No one loves you."


Sadly, these words come far to often.  Does this sound like your mind ever?


As I laid there red hot with anger and contemplating my whole existence I somehow slipped in, with strength that was not my own, the words "help me Lord".   And through the noise of a battle zone, trapped in the middle of enemy lines and curled up in a ball of despair I heard Him speak.  At first I felt betrayed and deeper frustrated because what I heard wasn't silence and then peace, but instead a question or riddle.  I heard, "who are you pleasing (living for)?"


Sometimes I put myself into the enemies hands because I am putting my trust in neither side.  Sometimes I am telling God that I am still needing to see Him work in my life so that I can find true peace in Him as my savior.  Sometimes I even keep God in a box and only listen if He responds by my demands.  I expected silence and safety, but last night the noise continued because He wanted  to help me see that I need to truly trust the One who is saving me from the enemy.  


Last night I wrestled with that riddle till I fell asleep.  But right before I fell asleep I wrote to two close friends, "pray for me because I'm feeling spiritually attacked".  Because in those hard times, we need help.  Then through the mind-bending riddle I found out who I am living for.  I wrote down "I'm addicted to trying to make people happy, (being a people pleaser) sometimes if I feel I can't make them happy I feel worthless, hurt and want to give up. I'm sorry God, I've forgotten my first love."


So this morning, I reread these words, contemplating the meaning of them and if it were true, because sometimes late at night I can write something down and later realize it made no sense at all.  But this time it was true.  I am a people pleaser.  I looked up what it meant and found this site, People Pleasers, and checked all of the criteria off by how I live.  


I live way too often thinking about how you or someone else may think of me.  Even now, as you read I could be curious if you like this? But why, that's not why I write!  I am not even a writer, and I got straight C's through every english/writing class I've ever had!  


[I write because I have felt the Lord wants me to, not because I want to make anyone think I am anyone special, or to make money or to become famous.  I don't make money, I am a nobody and only want to be a nobody and I definitely do not want to get swept up in becoming anyone special or famous.  Plus there is no possible way my writings can accumulate to anything other than a fellow Christians daily life and that's all I want this to be.]


Back to the point.  
I live for man's approval and I need to only worry about how the Lord sees me.  As easy as it is to type those words, it is not as easy to understand them.   How come I can agree with what that means, but never implement what it means into mental and spiritual proactive actions against this daily attacking enemy? =In constant commune with Christ.


I forget that I am weak and He is in control and that I MUST rely on Him always and He is the only one who can give me Strength, give me Peace, can truly love me, give me courage, give me meaning, give me rest...and lastly He is the only one that I want to live for.


I have been convicted by how I live for others approvals.  I forget who I am here for.  Do you too?  I listen to lies and then begin to believe them.  I get lost and caught in traps.  I throw my hands up and say I deserve to hear all the lies because I do think them sometimes.  I forget that I was adopted by the One and only God of the Universe, who is loving, when I finally put my trust in Him.  I forget that He will not take me back to the orphanage.  I forget that He will not punish me harshly.  I forget that He went through a huge process in order to save me from the family I was in.  I forget that He will never say "don't come home", or "you've hurt my family too much", or "I no longer want to be your Father."  He will always be my Father.  Now how am I going to live my life?  Grateful, stubborn, apathetic or unsure of my adoption?  Am I going to live more for the people around me who offer me nothing or for the One who did all He could to take me in and promise me a life that I would love forever? 


The Bible says a lot about people pleasing, rather than God:

Galatians 1:10 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,

James 4:4  You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.

The list goes on: Ephians 6:5-9, Matthew 6:1-34, Galatians 3:28, 2 Timothy 4:3-4, Matthew 6:33...

It also says this:

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Everybody goes through rough times. Finances, marriage, work, kids, family, emotional stress, the list goes on and on. None of God's children are immune to life's troubles, and God often uses those times to test us, refine us, and bring us closer to him.

Jodi always points out James for a good source of encouraging Bible verses. I guess James got her through some rough spots before she met me (not that I solve all her problems now...quite the opposite I must say!)

James 1:2-3 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

WHO HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING FOR LATELY?




PRAY AND ASK FOR MORE HELP FROM JESUS.

'this life we live'

Heaven by faith, grace by adoption.

Fathered by forgiveness and loved by my friend.

Given life by patience and forever longed for.

Spoken of light in darkness and promised safety.

In the face of a treacherous storm we are given

a hand by the one who made the wind blow.

Born with a will to strive for our hearts desires.

Reborn by our choice to give our life to Him

in the face of a world determined to live

against the King of the land.

For He knows all things about Himself,

and all things we think we are.

But loves us still by our hearts folly

and loose grip of Him and with

open arms He takes us into His arms 

every time we desire our gain stronger than His.

For Gods' glory and the sacrifice He

made for us is worthy of praise forever, 

and forever I will praise; 

After living this life striving after all

that is pure and pleasing to my Father in Heaven.

Hearing whispers of truth and writing them down can really catch your attention.

"I'll wait till the last minute..."

It's 2am and I can't sleep!  And I'm so glad!

I woke up this morning like every morning, with a strong desire to learn what the Lord was wanting to teach me today.  I got into bed though tonight at 11:30 not even thinking about whether or not I even gave Him a chance to speak.  I have been racing through my day, thinking that I listened to Him, but I really haven't given Him a second.

So as I laid in bed tossing and turning I said, "Well Lord is it too late?  Is there anything you were wanting to teach me today that I wasn't listening to all day long?"

And as if He were waiting right until I asked, He answered with a burst of anticipation,

"YES!"

Out came the biggest lesson of my day, even more so, probably months.

"Daniel, I love you more than you've been letting yourself see!  Kind of like you and your dad.  Get what I mean??"
"?"-me
So He went on,
"You see when you were young you always needed 'things', stuff really, to fill your joys or make you happy.  Your dad worked hard to give you things, fill those longings with things that would make you happy.  And it showed you he cared about you.  He knew it wouldn't last, but he always did what he knew best by trying his hardest to always make you happy (not only with material stuff too) .  It came out of almost your 'lacking of something'.  You would love it to death at first, then slowly you'd forget about it.  Then he would get something else for you.  Not to spoil you, but to show you he loved you.  First you lived in the downtown city, and he wanted you to live in the open country, so he worked hard to get you freed from the city lights and out into the wild.  Then came a pool, a four-wheeler, guitars, a room to yourself, and a car.  Each were not easy to get you know?  That car he worked hours and hours fixing up and then surprised you with a Jeep!  Your favorite car.  You loved that Jeep, and then out of nowhere you changed your mind.  It broke your dads heart, knowing that it wasn't as important as it was for so long.  Daniel, what would it take?  (my sacrifice?) As your Father I know what you need, and have given you all you have, even a dad and mom that have outdone themselves beyond what I've asked of them."


"Daniel, I will never stop loving you."


"We've had now 4 intense months together, our relationship has grown since you've been unemployed.  Our time together has become real, true friends.  Every morning hearing your heart your questions, your joy, and what you needed.  A job.  But then it changed, you wanted to just know me.  You forgot about wanting a job.  You just listened to me.  You've found true joy in my Son's life.  You're no longer looking for your next fix on a material possession.  Think about how hurt your dad could have been over the years, seeing your apathy grow towards things that once brought you joy.  And just like him, we still love you and will always love you.  My love will not change or stop due to your lack of seeing my love to the full."
----
So now at 2 in the morning I finally get it.  Sometimes I wait till the last minute.  Sometimes I barely think about what I'm doing.  Most of the time I figure "I'll listen eventually".  But the biggest ploy the enemy has against us is "just wait till later".  It was best to stop and listen that very moment, and not wait till tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow, it's my first day at my new job.  God is so good and so awesome!  The job I've been talking to God about for a long time, at a social work agency and working with youth.  He knew when would be a good time...(2 in the Afternoon would have been great too if I would have only listening then...)

I pray you listen to what He's wanting to teach you right now, and through the day!
If not, this might happen between you and the Lord at 2 in the morning.

Now back to bed...and finally tired.

Woe is me!

God,

I want to write to you, because I know you are here, and because you know me.

Because of both of those reasons I am broken and fearful.  You are God and are everything amazing.  I am a mess, a complete pile o dead twigs, not even a flower budding in my dead vines. I am rarely ever a useful bud or a living shoot.  I am striving and trying to grow but have been getting so confused by your pruning that I often give up or become to lazy to think about how you actually are helping me grow.  I get scared because of my lack of fruitfulness because I am most likely not doing to well in pleasing you.  I want to be your son whom you are pleased to watch and listen to at all times.  I am definitely not someone you are pleased with at all times.  I am a mess, and by mess I mean lost.  I am never remaining in your love, nor obeying you.  I think I am, feel like I am, think people think I am, but really are not.  I am fake.  I am a lie.  I am something like a huge actor, whom people love but is nothing charming off-stage.  I am always telling myself I am remaining in you, or feeling like people think I am, but never really are.  I am very distant.  Very lazy and horribly focused.  I need help staying focused!  

I want to be clean, new, impressive to you, holy, fixed, real, excited that I am in your love.  But I walk out of your love so often.  I get confused, get misguided, lose track, jump off the path, push you out of my mind.  I am disobedient.  I am sorry Lord.  How come you are still here with me?  Even at my darkest moments of anger, bitterness, lies, hatred, doubt, laziness, confusion or fear you are still there with me.  You never leave me.  Although I knew all while in my fit I could hear your voice, I turned my ear away from you though.  Like I am some kid being told to stop playing with his toys and come eat.  You know I need food and deep down I know I do too, but I just want to do what I want to do.  I heard you saying 'come eat', but I said maybe later, I want to pout awhile longer.  I heard, 'you are heir to my fathers inheritance' and I agreed but didn't care to get out of my pitiful fit of disobedience.  I heard, 'but i love you'.  And I stopped in my tracks and listened, turned back and for some reason kept on.  I am not what I feel I should be.  

I hear so often 'you're a wreck, sooner or later you'll be forgotten' and 'you know better, don't listen to your heart "he" doesn't know what's best for you'.  What have I done to myself?  I am a mess within a mess.  I listen to lies and forget how to listen to the truth.  I forget to remain in His love.  Even through all of my fits of anger, fear, confusion, etc. are in the middle of preparing a lesson for youth group.  On John 15 mind you.  O what a fake I am found to be in my lonely front room.  I hate how I am given credit of being solid enough to teach but I myself am seeing how fruitless I really am.  I should have so much fruit, I should be solid.  I shouldn't be getting angry, upset, frustrated and bitter for getting a ticket for an expired plate, or for not getting a job that gives me joy, or for having to pay out the wazoo for car repairs that came out of nowhere.  So often I hear 'WHY ME'.  'What did I do?'  Why am I such a confused, bitter young man.  I'm not even a bitter old man, I'm already bitter and almost 24.  

God, I hate what I know you hate in me.  I want to be better, I need to be what you want me to be.  But I get in the way so much!  I want to be your son, but I'm more like the distant cousin that never comes around.  I'm like the forgot rotting dish in the back of our fridge.  I am so messed up.  I am not right, because I have not remained in you.  At a time when I should be blissfully filled with peace, I am weighted down by my selfishness.  You know Lord, I just read over the last week 1&2 Samuel and 1&2 Kings, Ezra..and I get it so much better now!  How you are the true vine and how "Israel was planted as the vine, entirely true...but became a wild vine, turned to bitterness" Jeremiah 2:21.  And how now you are my King!  How you are now the true vine.  The vine, not just a random shoot, but the vine.  And not just some random story either, you knew what you were talking about! I hate how I forget and get distracted.  Help me to remember to remain in you and to know that you remain in me.  I need to be alright with getting pruned, and getting my feet taken from underneath me.  Without it I won't remember whose hand is always there to pull me back up.  Thanks for remaining in me, because my excuses and failures get the best of me.  I need to own up to my lack of remaining in you and remember you are always near.

Praise you God for sending your son to come for me and to die for my sins, as heavy of a burden as they were and forgave me! 

Woe is me!

ah, there you are, now I feel better.

unMasked

Days.
Good days and bad days.


Somedays are a beautiful dream.
Some days are cold even when its warm out.
Some times I fear everyone doubts me.


I'll hate to be myself because I'm a mess.
Did the world forgot about me?


Somedays I'm alive.
I'll feel joy through every mundane spec.


I'll love the fact that I'm a mess but don't care.
I'll walk as if the world is an amusement park.


Somedays I hide.
Somedays I fight to be alright.
Somedays I lie to myself about myself.
Somedays I listen to those lies, knowing their lies.
Somedays I forget how to fight them.


Somedays I forget that the Lord saved me.
Somedays I forget that I am really special to Him.


I sit back and forget the truth.
Even though it quickly fixes me.


Everyday the enemy encircles me.
I forget to fight against him and find peace in the Lord.


This is today. This is everyday.


2 Corinthians 10:5 “Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;”

Hearing God's Voice

"I am tweaked again. 
Royally flippin' tweaked.
I'm so tired and wrung, my body hurts from being tired.
Or hurts at the first chance to let down and be tired." -John Eldridge (walking with God)


"I loath my very life; therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul.  Job 10:1


When the world around you seems to crumble like a flaky muffin, or when your daily joy no longer comes from what you have found comfortable; the Lord is pulling you near to him.


Over the last months the Lord has drawn me to Himself.  Although it has taken time to realize what exactly He is doing, I have found Him near to me and able to hear His voice.


Not having a job, not getting the job of my dreams, expectations crushed and fearing a daily deepening depression; I have found that life is not about the comfort of having a beautiful comfy little life.  The Lord has more in store for me than a comfy feeling at the end of the day.


He wants me, more than I've wanted Him.


I have been busy, trying to figure "it" out.  When will life ease up, or finally get into its groove.


He says, wake up! today, for today is where I want to see you seek me.  Not the things of this world.  Anything you gain in this world will be left in this world, but what you gain in Me, I will find joy in you when I see you face to face.


I have been denying my lack of devotion to Him.  I think I am fine.  I wake up an hour early to read and pray.  I pray all day long.  Face to the ground.  Having nowhere to go or no daily agenda, I cry "O, God help me!" I have been in the dust.  If I had dust around me I would have covered my body just as Job did.  But all I have is tears.


All I've wanted was to get a job, which would have taken me west 10 hours and blessed Jodi and I's life in many ways.  Am I not good enough for that job?  I must be no good.  I AM a loser.  I believed 2 months ago I would have that job, that security, that hope filled.  Now I am lost and confused after waiting to hear from them for a month.  O how we can believe satan so easily.  Agreeing to his statements.  We listen to satan and think he was right.


But the truth is: I was waiting on God to help me, when He was there all along.  Deut. 13:3 says, "The LORD your God is testing you to find out whether you love him with all your heart and will all your soul."


PAIN. PA-IN. PennsylvaniA to INdiana.  All I had dreamed of, hoped for, thought I'd get.  I prayed, I fasted, I thought I did everything I was suppose to do. Right? Others prayed too!


"It's not that God doesn't want us to be happy.  He does.  It's just that he knows that until we are holy, we cannot really be happy." -John Eldridge


"Usually through pain God is asking us to let go of the things we love and have given our hearts to, so that we can give our hearts even more fully to Him." -JE


It is hard not to make agreements to the spirit of discouragement, doubt, comfort, and resignation.  To give into what we know we shouldn't.  To lose hope.


But who am I listening to?


God I am a wreck.  I want life the way I want life.  It is wrong, I know now.  Help me hear your voice.  help me to get right.  Help me hear your voice right now.  What are you speaking to me?


Daniel, you are my son, as your Father I have everything you need.  Come near to me and I will guide you where I want you to be.  Trust me.  I love you.  You are my beloved son.  Don't you know I know what I am doing?  It was just a job.  This life I have given you is bigger than that.  More important than that.  You have money saved up right?  You are safe and secure.  Now, trust me.  


O yeah, O yeah.  I forgot.  I wasn't really trying to listen to you. I was listening to myself.  


Yeah, but now you're with me.  That's all I want.


Well Lord, thanks for your peace. I was scared.  I was full of fear.  I was lost.  But now life is beautiful and I have nothing but you.  This is a blessing.


Anxiety, fear, self loathing, anger and depression: these were my choices;  I chose to listen to my enemy.  I forget satan is a real enemy.  That he is real.  More importantly, I forgot that God was real and present.  I forgot to listen to Him.


"The first and greatest command is to love God with our whole being.  yet, it is rare to find someone who is completely given over to God.  And so normal to be surrounded by people who are trying to make life work.  We think of the few who are abandoned to God as being sort of odd.  The rest of the world - the ones trying to make life work - seem perfectly normal to us."  - John Eldridge


For further encouraging guiding words go to Job 38.  The Lord replies to Jobs sorrows, confusions, fears, double-minded thoughts.  And Job 42, Job replies to the Lord.


This is how we should live.


God speaks.  We have to listen.  He is right there. Right now. Right now.  Ask Him something.  
(This sadly is rarely spoken of, even in church.  We hear hundreds of stories of God speaking to His people, but we are not taught that He speaks to us "like that anymore".  Why read and not believe He speaks to us anymore? What is it we are believing?)


God, help me see that all I need is you.  Strip away what I don't need.  Bring me closer to you.  It may bring pain.  It may be out of my comfort.  It might be different than I expected.  But if it gets me closer to you, then do it by all means.  You are God.  I cannot have reservations for this earth.  I am selfish, and my will brings me closer to earthly desires and not your will.  As I pause and wait, help me to hear your whisper, your quiet patient voice.  


"Until now you have not asked for anything in my name.  Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete."  John 16:24

Brave Lions

This life we live is not as simple as a bird swaying in the breeze.


It's hard to put anything into words normally.  And to find meaning in anyone else's words are like separate worlds explaining each others culture.   What two people see while looking down from a mountain are fairy tales apart.  Same ending of a desperate need for understanding their joy and a lifetime away from matching each others reasons for it.


Me:
What I find to often to be felt in my heart is like a caged animal.  These are emotions.  The unsuspecting acknowledgement of this animal is normally automatic and sensed before or after most occasions.  Far too often though the inward is acknowledged and kept safely underneath the surface.   To many thoughts of what is going on behind the backdrop happens like a curtain drawn before a play.  And this is where I begin, and where I end.  This is who I am, often someone who is somewhat aware of what action to take or show, but waits.  Some can call this dumb, others a coward and others wise.  I know, though, the Lord has me this way for a reason.


Some people are expressive, others expressive without cause.  Some are simply quiet, and some are quiet because they are found trapped to be otherwise.  I am found somewhere in the quiet spectrum, and rarely found in the expressive.  Like I said, it's hard to put anything into words.  Like a whip giving a lashing, it knows not what it's action creates.  The horse knows full well though.  So does the skin of anyone who's ever experienced its fierce crack.  But the whip is only a whip and never used on itself.  And so often this can be our caged animal.  Fully alive, made aware but lost for it's use.  Like a gift with no direction.  Like a billboard for a free car to all who come, but never saying where to go.


Personal introspection, as to self-observe and give report of conscious inner thoughts, desires and sensations come naturally.  By this no one but self knows.  Extrospection, as to observe things externally from one's self is seen by everyone but self.  The whip knows it moves, but is unaware of its delightful gift.  Just like the caged lion who is unaware of why he is caged.


The thought that often follows far to often and without being spoken or heard, is "why?".   This question comes from a century of questions.  This was the first question the newborn unknowingly asks and the last question the elderly sadly might be thinking.


Why do I have a grasp on a mental process or outward verbal expression, which meets others like vomit or a sweet aroma?  To be honest this is a question far older than we even think about.  Not only did our oldest relatives question their families status, move east, "start fresh", gain personal status, try to answer THEIR own why question or wonder if they were needed "here".


I'll take you to where I believe this "why" began.  And sadly did not stop.


This life we live is not for the answers.


The unavoidable fact or reason where questions are directed to is known usually.  To a friend, a parent, a coworker, a boss or an enemy.  But how often do we realize the question is much deeper than that.  Now to put a point on the map as to where the question began is found in Eden.


Why did, Why was, Why were, Why can, Why Why Why.  It makes a sudden anger arise and doubt hit the fan as well as the caged animal fight for its freedom.  What answer from any situation are we truly seeking?  A logical, reasoned solution to cure an already faced barrier away from joy?  Joy that was lived before it arose?  Before any question comes into your mind from any daily happening was there truly joy?  And if so from where?


When I wake up I am joyful for the days new beginning.  The hope I have in finding the fresh start to the day.  By noon though, there has suddenly became a break in the gap.  The day is no longer as sweet as I remembered it being in the morning.  I am rushed.  I am longing for that hope, that freedom from the joy of the day unfolding.  But by noon I have found that it's not coming out to be as adored as I had hoped.  I'm getting buried under stress of my expectations.  I begin to ask questions. And again, there I find an animal roaring behind a curtain.


Now back to Eden.  When Adam fell, he was not longing for much.  He knew what he had and why and what for and...by who.  From what the Bible tells us, God and Adam had communion, real communication and no barrier.  Which broke soon after the apple incident.  What a choice!  But what question was going through Adams head?  Maybe, why not?  Maybe he had felt God's love, which was so amazing and real, and thought that God would not be hurt?  Was he thinking God would maybe forgive and forget then and there?


Whatever the question, or thought or denial Adam went through, we are going through still.  We are afraid to stop asking though.  I believe Adam hit rock bottom outside of the garden, felt like a complete idiot and came to repent from that very moment.  Never asking why again.  Or at least I like to think it that way.  He learned his lesson.


But have we?  Have we not gotten angry at God because we find ourselves lost in our own emotions?  Have we gotten so relaxed in finding that we can control situations that when they fall apart our anger seems suitable?  Are we really that pride(fall)?


Like a Good king over his realm, he states the boundaries.  Not because he just felt like doing it that way, but because he fought for them, he made it possible to be as large or as small.  Not to have his country ask why it was not bigger but because he knew what they needed.


In our minds we think like a caged animal.  Mindless, deranged, scared and full of rage.  Or possibly just sleeping between fits of rage.


The way which our God has paved through Christ is like that Good king who fights for more land than needed to make his people overly joyful.


This life we live is not as simple as a bird swaying in the breeze, because that bird will soon have to find shelter from the coming storm.  He may have to fly south but for him he has only one option.  To flee.  He cannot ask why.  He can not fight the storm and answer it's reason for being there.  He accepts his battle and fights a good fight, by leaving the danger.  Like human nature.  Except we often fight instead and find we are stubborn and a fool for trying.  When facing God, as a fool, we'll lose everytime.


But he is the Good King.  Who bought up all the land around Him, so much so that it is bigger than His people need.  He opened the door as well.  Allowing others to come in.  Not to overrule the chosen people, but to become as equals under Him.


When there are storms and we try to fly through them we'll only get hit by hail.  And as a spiritually small bird, that can kill you.  Don't let your human nature become stubborn and stay there, to close yourself off from the freedom that has been handed to you.  Choose to let the caged animal be tamed and given a purpose, a purpose only Christ can give.  He knows the introspection and extrospection of self better than you.


Face the storms with the knowledge that Christ makes sense of them all  Without Him the storm is a destructive storm, but with Him the storm is an opportunity to getting to know his purpose for that storm.

Email to a friend.

 Yeah, the whole Bible’s always kind of present when we preach any part of the gospel, you know?


Yeah, i guess we can't always watch the last episode of a 2 season show and understand the magnitude of the story.  But when the first 5 minutes of the show caps up the last 39+ shows it makes that last show all you really needed to watch. 

Not to long ago it would have been like watching a random show in the middle of a season all the characters would have been like reading the bible and hearing about moses, abraham, david, samson...and wondering what part they had to the series. Gladly now those episodes are coming together.

This is a heart issue so don't just write it on your hand.

The Lord knows what He's doing.
When you ask the Lord to change you, grow you and stretch you, it's never in a way you expect.
Over the past month I've been humbled by a selfish desire to 'grow me' and found nothing but a simple fool.

I can be very proud of myself and my accomplishments.  Yet, in spite of giving the Lord the glory of it all, I often lack that step in my daily routine.  I may grow mentally, physically or spiritually... but I almost always give myself the graditude of my achievements.  

I have gone for quite some time living in this norm called my life.  I give little attention to how I have multiple idols in my life, which I have set up.  I have formed a trophy room in my head of who I am, what I want to do, and how I want to be percieved.  How foolish to think I am something when I know I am not.

I am not this outer shell called Daniel Weaver.  I am not the books collected on my bookselfs.  I am not the songs I write or record.  I am not the pictures I take or the poems I write.  I am not the car I drive or the hair on my head.  I am not the blog that I write or the music site I've set up.  I am not even the health I try to keep or the apartment I keep clean.  I am not the things I do. All of these will die and be forgotten.

I say I am not this shell called Daniel Weaver because to be anything is only to put a jacket over the real image first created.  I have found my shell to be not of the outer appearance or attempts to cover or find this mystery of "who i am".  The true image I need to be focusing on is not what I AM, but the total opposite, how Christ has given me life!  The fact of who I am, is nothing.  When I die I am not the books on my shelf, the songs I played or anything I've done.  I will be dead in the ground before I fully understand how pointless my attempts to build myself up were.  I would have set myself up for failure. 

Things I know that I am:
1.  Galations 2:20
2.  Exsisto Verus

Both are meaningfully and tactfully placed tattoos on my right side (1) and on my left wrist(2).
(with this I do not endorse nor condone tattoos or the idea that it will do anything but distract you for awhile, It took me getting 2 tattoos to realize I didn't need them)  But since I do, I am glad they are centered on Christ. And here is why:

1.  "I have been crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me.  The life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave His life for me."

When I think I need to be anything or build up my persona I am reminded that I am nothing without Christ and my purpose is to give Him praise with everything I do.  The flesh and personality of DW is dead.  The life which I am now is lived by Christ.

2. What is Exsisto Verus?!  Exsisto Verus is translated literally from latin as "exist/consistent/be/being/always, true/truthful/faithful"

In history this was a crest for Weavers.  In this story the weavers were not "thread weavers" who wove garments.  Although I am sure they did their part.  In this story, I found through doing research in college,  the weavers of this family were the servants to the Queen of England.  They were her "second hand man" and when needing anything of menial work or extravegant duties, they were there to do it.  So what does that mean for me? Do I wish to serve a queen? Not really.  But I do want to be the second hand man to God if and when He needs me for any type of work that He needs done.  I need to be obedient.  And a constant reminder on my wrist does that sometimes.  Not always though.  Because the words written on my heart are what are piercing and bring true righteous obedience, permanent ink on my wrist does nothing. 

This is a heart issue so I can't just write it on my hand.  If my heart seeks to glorify myself I will die giving praise to myself, and ultimately I would find fear in my sandy foundation I have built myself upon.  But, if I seek to glorify my Creator, my Father, my Comforter, my Lord He will be given true praise in the life I lived.  Because I did not live according to my desires and character but of His whose will is perfect.  Mine isn't, at all.  That is a fact. One I am willing to be reminded of by anyone.  This is something I am working on.  When I write, read or play I do so trying to pass time giving Christ praise and hopefully encouraging someone who needs a hand.

3.  The Holy Spirit Lives in those who trust Him.
4.  I should not be in want.
5.  God love you and me.
6.  Pray without ceasing.


Dan in real life.

Set Goals towards the Goal.

Even through distance and the lack of communication the lessons of my past never die.

Attempting to grow on my own only created a schemer a mocker and a liar.
In fact, "to grow" as a kid meant nothing, but seeking my own understanding.

I am blessed to have grown up with many things, one thing in particular was a dad who knew what was important and always kept to it.  For someone who would rather not accept attention or praise He taught me some of the best lessons.  Although I was either seeming to not pay attention or was unable to grasp the seriousness of his character I still saw his strength through my foggy binoculars.  I was young, dumb and too selfish to think anyone was any smarter than myself.   But in fact my dad taught me to take life serious in all cases and to be light hearted and loving to all.  For most of my life I thought that my dad was someone pretty cool but unsure if he really knew what he was doing.  In my attempts to grow into a mature adult I have realized that he was right all along.  I realized I had to use the same methods he always used and instructed by.  Integrity, by which he bases his work, humility in which his foundation is set firm and also, the reason to which we are living is not small or meaningless.  Lastly, to provide and work hard because not all things come easy and that everything is a blessing.

Now all that said there are quite a lot of examples to be said of but one thing that I remember the best and always bugged me growing up was his repetition of goal setting.  He loves to have goals, he strives on goals and he knows that without them his day is a bit stale.  Although he is a very relaxed and nonmilitant whatsoever man he knows that the small puzzle piece of a regimented task and daily list or life list has taught me a lot.  I can say that that small, or large, puzzle piece he has given me has gotten me to where I am today.  To see his passion for growth inspired me to see that I want to have a passion as well.  Growing up my passion was to first find my mountain and head for the top.  My dads approach taught me that the mountain is attainable yet it may take your whole life getting to the top.  You must gather your necessities, know what your path will bring, choose your path, and be patient.

Just to add my own personal revelation to his wisdom:
One thing that I said a few months ago with friends on a hike and realized it sounded a bit too brilliant to have come out of my own mouth was "The adventure is not in the destination but en route".

Meaning the joy of a trip is not always where you set out to go, but it is in the journey to the top while experiencing the life around you.  We had so much fun talking and getting to know the people around us that, after a few hours, we realized we went quite a few miles in the wrong direction.  We even knew that the vista point would be uphill and for a few hours we were going downhill!  The 10 or so friends didn't even realize that we were lost.  We were on the wrong path.  This path though had huge implications to my daily life.  Where am I going, am I going in the right direction, who is following me, will we make it there by nightfall?  I was the one leading everyone in the wrong direction.  I had been on the right path months before, yet never remembered the right paths' name.  Talk about feeling stupid.  But all in all, the friendships that were created and bonded through the en route of the journey was more important than that vista point.  No one cared we went the wrong way, they all agreed that it was still fun to go on a hike with everyone.  Now to me, at first, I doubted that flippant remark and got down about my mistake. My goal was to make it to the top, not to make stronger friendships.  One thing I realized, was that God has his own adventures planned for us even though we try to create our own.

The goals we set are important.  Almost the most important decisions towards building character and Christ-likeness.  My dads persistence towards growing in life towards Christ through goal setting is a prime example of what a Father is asked to do and and due to his following of Christ in his life I too follow Christ in my life.  He is a wise man and a man of few words but a man with wise words when spoken.  But to me I have realized, in my opinion, a wise man says less than any other man because wisdom is not ours to create, thus little can be said or is needed to be said.  But to say that, for those who do not know him, he is not a quiet or shy man, but in fact a very joyful and loving man of God.  Well-rounded, I'd say, because no wise man can be truly wise and not be filled with joy.  Many people actually thought C.S. Lewis was probably a very dull, extremely intelligent and serious man but in fact in the book called Jacks Life, it exposes his complete opposite appearance from the perceived studious figure.

So to be proud of the life I have been brought up in and continue in it I too encourage people to be mindful of their daily decisions and desire to grow through goals.

My goals from 1 year ago:

Goals to set:

Analyze my thoughts when meeting people and be sure to listen to the truth which God states about all people in John 13:34-35, which says, "A new command i give you: Love one another.  As i have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this all men will know that you my disciples, if you love one another."  This command is a very important reminder to keep when meeting and talking to friends or new individuals.  This also reminds me of a sermon I recently heard which stated "people will now we are Christians by our love and not our belongings or anything else".  The way that we treat others is largely effected by the truth which Christ has told us about everyone.  That everyone is equal and we should love them all as ourself. (Mark 12:28-31)

Never conclude beliefs due to my emotions or my own understandings - be sensitive to the Spirit and be in constant prayer.  The more I am in prayer the more I feel peace and comfort from the Lord in all I do.  There has never been a time when I am in prayer that i feel lost or confused.  There has though, been many times where I am not in prayer and feel lost and confused, stressed and begin to doubt myself.  (Proverbs 3:5, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding) 

Allow yourself to go beyond your comfort zone - allow God to stretch you, grow you and mend you into the man of God He desires of you.  I so often stick to my own routine and schedule, which inhibits me from any growth or possibility of going outside of my comfort zone.  But EVERY TIME I allow myself to go outside of my comfort zone I feel blessed from the Lord and encouraged immensely.  (Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

My goals from 2 years ago:

1 year from now.

together serving/traveling together.

engaged or married.woah.

all year i work on an old camper and we go around the states and camp.

together.

making music.

painting in our sunday bests.

in love.

living in the now.

fully relying on God.

The camper idea hasn't quite happened yet, but if the Lord desires for us to do so, he'll give us a road map for that journey when it's time.

God Bless and Godly goal setting.



love dan.

I read therefore I grew

Contrary to my growing years, I like to read.

The push to read small books when I was young was more painful to me than my kindergarten teacher pulling my teeth.  Yet, somehow books have snuck in undetected.  I can't give any credit to high school whatsoever, or really most of college.

In all honesty, I might have read just as much in High School as in college.  In college I was the guy who listened, didn't take notes and somehow passed the test.  I did although have a notebook and a pen.  But, truth be told, I was doodling a sketch of the professor or writing lyrics or a general outline of my daily dream to accomplish.  I always 'loved' hearing the saying, "College teaches you not what to learn, but HOW to learn."  Whoever made that up didn't have my professors.  Respectfully, I did have great professors, but to learn is not to read.  To learn is to be applicable.  Or at least in my case.  And I studied social work.  I daily worked socially with everyone around me and found myself able to mimic my class discussions with everyone who didn't study social work and sound like I learned a great deal.  So much that the topics stuck in my head so well I even passed college.

Now I am no philosopher or idealist towards a specific way of thought or preferred educational outline so I'm going to get back to my point.  I can read now!  I learned of this phenomenon recently.  I have been reading books and then picking up another and then finding myself incapsulated by the author for some reason I have yet to find out.

The television has subliminal messages, my coke has high contents of sugar and my fat fast food burger is laden with salt.  All those ingredients can lead me to believe that I am getting something I like, thus, I want more.  So begins an addiction.  But with reading a book there must be invisible words encouraging me to keep reading because I read and never cease.

Well as with everything is a battle of nature vs nurture; as I learned in my SW classes.  And in this case it has to do with neither, I just wanted to throw a term out to familiarize you with my learnings.  Getting to the point, I have found that the truth an author brings by way of imagination and colorful reasonings lights my mind with ease and makes, for a moment, a cocoon of soothing remedies to the fallen world around me.  Not all authors do this though.  Some create a world inside a world, trapped and lonely, dazed into a coma state and feeling desperate for answers.  Those authors are into trickery, self-appraisal and judgmental unbiblical ideologies.

I believe if a book is good it must stem from another, and not it's own. Because no book can create a depth as deep as one author may do and generate enough longing interest and captivate your heart long enough to be considered a good book.  This is in part, and by far, why the Bible has become such a beautiful book to me and never brought close, not physically but mentally, to any other book in preference.  For to many reasons, for which all true Christians know, the Bible is so great that men and women are still brought to tears and curiosity that they dedicate their whole lives to absorbing its message.  Being God inspired, not idea inspired, politically, monetarily or popularity inspired.  It is full of depth and the more you read the more you find the connections of God's will being carried from the old Testament to the New Testament, from Revelation to the Old Testament and from story to story loaded with encouragement and hope.  Most of all a promise.  No author has much to say other than an idea or notion to try and make a buck or two.  Try making a promise with your reader that they could die for and see if they'll listen today.

As I have grown accustom to reading the Bible I've found there are authors outside of the Bible who I have found stem all of their directing points and truths from the Bible, thus they are great authors and books as well.   The books I have read I encourage everyone to read, as we are all asked to instruct and encourage others towards Christ.  I will list them in order of my preference of which generally should be read first to last.

Read all simultaneously while going through the Bible and commentary:
Lighter reading, still very deep and easy to understand
1. The Pilgrims Progress (modern english version) John Bunyan
2. The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis
3. Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis
4. The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis
5. Skrewtape Letters by C.S. Lewis
6. The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller

More intense reading and challenge, remember we should challenge ourselves sometimes! :
7. The Four Loves by C.S. lewis
8. The Everlasting Man by G. K. Chesterton
9. The Pursuit of God by A. W. Tozer
10. Celebration of Discipline by Foster
11. The new Evidence that Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell
12.  Spiritual Leadership by Sanders

Light, fun, encouraging, Christian and creative
1.  Pilgrims Progress STILL #1, it is easy, awesome and powerful!
2.  The Great Divorce STILL
3.  The Pilgrims Regress by C.S. Lewis
4.  The Lord of the Rings Trilogy and the Hobbit by Tolkien
5.  Letters to Malcolm: Chiefly on Prayer by C.S. lewis
6.  A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis (especially in the face or faced the death of a loved one)
7.  Till We have faces by C.S. Lewis
8.  The Singer The Song and the Finale (trilogy) by Miller (really awesome books)
9.  Miracles by C.S. Lewis
10. The Cosmic/Space trilogy by C.S. Lewis

As I read I'll let you know what I've found to be a great book, and let you know what I've learned from it. Until then, if you are wanting to read but haven't read much lately this blog is a great transition to your next reading exercise.

Dan

I Limp when I'm away.

One thing that I daily realize I do, without intentions, is allowing my heart to change when I am around individuals who I know nothing about.  My heart changes from loving and caring for strangers and changes when I am around friends who are believers and friends who I know are not believers.  For some reason my heart becomes shut off when I am in a gas station or eating at a restaurant or walking past a neighbor or sitting at a coffee shop.  I admit that in those moments I become silent and dead.  My faith is in my heart and not on my tongue.  My joy for the Lord is not a thought but a internal secret.  My eyes do not see people who the Lord longs for.  Although when I know full well I am around a believer or a nonbeliever my speech comes from my heart and my joy is alive.  But only when I "know" them and they speak of their beliefs.

I am a believer among believers and nonbelievers, and not those I have no clue about.  That has brought an epidemic to my thoughts and like a plague I notice it more and more.  If my heart is only awake when I know the people around me and their heart, what makes me sleep and stops me from seeing my need to serve the Lord is at all times with all people? Due to my realization and ability to catch my faults I will be trying to live out what Christ has asked me to become not only to those I know.  This is not a task for everyone but only those who feel the same pressures and convictions of their inconsistent walk.  We who walk need to walk straight up at all times, not limp when we are not being watched.

John 21:15-17
When Christ asked Peter three times if he still loved Him Peter became frustrated.  He said three times "Yes, you know that I love you."  And three times Christ replies with "feed my lambs/sheep."  Not feed the good sheep, healthy sheep, sheep who you think look better, or the sheep who come to you daily and listen.  But all sheep.  All meaning even those who you know you don't care about, the ones who you have hurt, the ones you have punished by not feeding, the ones who don't want to be your sheep and get lost.  Even the ones you pass by daily and don't think their worth caring for because you think they are fine not being cared for.

Pray that when I am convicted to feed all sheep that I listen, obey and do it and not limp around when I think no one is watching.  As well as the ability to let the joy I have in the Lord be seen and never held back.

Love, Dan

Day OFF.

Yeah, so that was suppose to be a song from the Lord of the Rings.

When the ball drops or the trumpet sounds.

Its a new year tomorrow.  All debt and dirt will finally get wiped clean and all can start a new exciting and free year on this loving planet.  Not! Well although the world wishes it could happen, the Lord does not promise the world will get better, cleaner, more efficient, "greener", more loving or agreeable politically or spiritually.  We know that is exactly the opposite of what the Lord shows us in the book of Revelation.

Recently, (over 2 months or so) I have taken a huge interest to the book of Revelation.  The Lord has a lot in store, and to "the world" and nonbelievers, it's not going to be all that pretty or fun.  But if we are saved, meaning; trusting in our Lord Jesus Christ, our Savior who is the Messiah of the Old Testament, the Savior of all who believe in Him, the God incarnate, who died for all mens sins who ask for forgiveness and then came back to life (portraying we would also have eternal life) and rose to heaven (as we too shall rise)...we have nothing to fear from this world or the people in it!!!!  We should not fear men but trust the Lord's will is just and perfect.

Reading Revelation I love particularly the  few chapters 19, 20, 21 & 22.  I have found that my excitement and my confidence in Christ (and not my own attempts to be confident) grows the more and more I reread those chapters every few days.  What am I living for?  What am I "here" for?  What do I do with my time?  What will tomorrow bring?  How much money should I have?  How can I keep going?  When will I get a break from all the stress and expectations?  ALL these questions can be answered and make a believer smile when reading those chapters.  Or really all of the "red letters" in the NT.  We are of a different spirit, birth, inheritance, character, mind and purpose than EVERYONE on this planet.  We are given a new name, loved, given peace, and accepted.  As most other religions wait on a "world teacher" we know that we are different.  We know Christ came as the Lord of Lords and not  just a "good world teacher who will bring justice and peace" but Christ came and is going to come back!  This WE know will be the antichrist for all of them.  [pray for the lost around you, and instruct them into the love the Lord gives freely]

Christ is coming back someday!  We are "waiting on the curb"so to speak and waiting for His return because we want to go home and we can only get there by Him giving us "that ride there".

So tonight marks the ending of a year.  Lets all eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we may die [like the lost]. OR Lets take joy in what the Lord has done in our lives.  Lets GET EXCITED about how we know Him, who He has changed us from, and how He loves us unconditionally. Lets take each day as an opportunity to grow in our relationship with God our Father.

So when someone asks 'off the cuff' "What's your new years resolution!?" Answer back something with a meaty answer.  Something That the Lord desires for you this year, NOT yourself.  Not weight control, investment gains, or popularity etc. But to grow in Him, learning how to hear Him, and how to OBEY Him when He asks you to speak, love, encourage or instruct.

Rev. 22:12 "Behold, I am coming SOON!  My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done.  I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End."

John 10:7

Therefore Jesus said again, “Very truly I tell you, I am the gate for the Sheep."


At a time when my job and a way of life is becoming more and more at the front of my mind I become more and more interested in a marketable trade which allows me to still enjoy life and not become overwhelmed with the "the boss vs employee delima".  At my age I know I can and should work. Actually I have come to realize I'll be working till i die I'm pretty sure with the look of our countries changes towards uncertainty etc.. So ill work, for a long time doing something I love or something I moderately enjoy but somehow "tolerate".  Although I may tolerate my job, i don't want to become overwhelmed with monotony of a dead end job.  Some people do well with the everyday deal.  I on the other-hand, tolerate it.  I am somewhere in the middle.  I hate drastic change, and i never want to do the same thing everyday.  

where i am:

Having a degree in Social work, somewhat understanding of the construction process, musically inclined and at a recording level, daily growing in the field of Solar Power at my current job and wondering daily what I will do next.  Example-Overseas orphanage work, SW with at risk teens, or continue installing solar energy solar panels, cutting an album, or combining them into one very eclectic/energy saving new business/group home.

All great options. And still content with my current situ.

What I have been looking into for the past months:

Specialized Organic Herding/farming.  This would be first as a hobby.  But through my research, reading and asking people who have experience...there can always be a profit with a hobby.  For my inklings, Goats/Sheeps in particular have a large market in the US and all of the world for their meat, dairy and fiber.  The industry of goats and Sheep (personal favorites for positive gains due to their similar avenues of gain) 65-70% of all red-meat consumed globally is goat meat.  This is more of a larger % outside of the US but with the US growing ethnically the growth for goat/sheep meat in the US is growing rapidly.  That is just 1 thing ill share over too many stats you don't want to read I'm sure.  But thoughts towards doing this only generate a joy in my heart.  

Pros:

Working from Home;  Being Self-Sustaining;  Sheep herding;  Learning how to really Weave Yarn;  Learning how to slaughter meat for myself;  Knowing where my meat really comes from;  Selecting profitable breeds good for fibers, meats, show and dairy;  Learning how to pasteurize milk;  Learning how to breed;  Having a farm land and many many more. I could also have the youth group kinds over frequently to learn life lessons through herding metaphors. 

Cons:

Start up $, Slow growth, A lot more research for breeds vs sicknesses vs shearing techniques vs breed uses... Also the most important- the need for land. 

But although I may have to work till i die, I wouldn't mind working 2 jobs till I'm 30-40 if after that I can stay at home working with my own resources to feed Jodi and myself.  

Also, Sheep are stupid animals.  What? Yeah, not the brightest, and SO are we.  What a joy it would be working with the greatest metaphor for God's people.  We are his sheep, He loves us all equally (no matter how often we mess up) and "feed my sheep" (not only the literal sheep though).

This life we live.

John 10:27

1 Peter 2:25

Hebrews 13:20

Romans 8:36

watch out!

I'll be writing this to inform family and friends of what all is going on in my life and to bridge that gap between distance, phone calls and emails.

For example,

Today is the first real snow we've found falling all around us. As I type the snow is rising quickly and from our 3rd floor apartment we can see white covered rooftops and cautious drivers passing on the near road.

We got home at 3 after church and having a pancake lunch with Roger, Shelly (Jodi's parents) and awesome newer friends Paul and his 2 cousins from S. Korea.  His two cousins are visiting in order to enjoy a time in the American culture, learn English and visit family.  Next we were/are hoping to have friends over for a music hour and fellowship at 6:30 but with the snow coming down and no one living less than 10 miles from us we might not have a room full of as creative music as we hope.  But our fingers are still crossed.

Recently I brought from Jodi's parents house an old small organ and violin, which go well with guitar and mandolin.  I've also taught myself all of the major and minor chords for playing piano.  Violin will take a lot longer learning ALTHOUGH it is the same tuning as a mandolin so it makes it really easy to know where notes are and so on, the bow part is tough.

Outside of our music and weather news Jodi and I would greatly appreciate your prayers towards understanding what to do job-wise.  Although we DO have great jobs that are a HUGE blessing we have been looking into social service etc. jobs near us in Bethlehem and Allentown.  Even though we are searching we are not in any rush either but we know that we are called to do what the Lord has blessed us with scholastically and using our abilities in our field of study.  BUT although I/we would love to work with young to older teens at risk/ homeless/ addicts etc., we are perfectly fine with how the Lord has provided us a job at The Heat Shed/ GeoGenix (Jodi in the office and me installing Solar energy power panels) and we could do it till the Lord returns.

The great thing about our jobs is that no matter where we are and who we are around that right there is our mission field.  God does not call literal missionaries who travel overseas the only ones who are doing His work but those who are following Him everyday in our everyday life.  Having lived in Greece for 3 months last year and going to give help to missionaries I have grown in respect towards missionaries and the call they have on their life.  I respect their obedience to God's call on their hearts.  Jodi and I are also both willing to take that risk if God ever brought to our lives an opportunity where He needs us to go somewhere to serve Him and His people.

I will write more as time goes on, Jodi has just made some awesome smelling soup and I'm starving.

Praise God we have more than we deserve.  A warm small apartment, friends, soup, His Word, His Promise, and a Father who calls us his Children.

We love and miss you.